Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Update On My Search...

In my last post I mentioned that I have been searching for a new therapist. I really appreciate all of the comments and e-mails I have gotten regarding this issue. It has really helped me so much.

I got one e-mail reply from a therapist who is pretty close to where I live. She informed me that she has a lot of experience working with dissociation, and a little bit of experience with DID. She said we can talk more about what my needs are and if I feel comfortable she wants to do an interview. I haven't e-mailed her back yet because I'm still thinking about all of this. I'm also hoping for the other two therapist to write me back as well.

I decided to be brave and talk to my sister, Brooke, about all of this. I really wanted to get someone's opinion about it who knows me really well and who knows my t as well. I explained to her the situation - how I really like my t but I feel that I'm not progressing anymore and the things my t has said or done in the past few months. After I explained it all to her, she told me that it would be best if I looked for a new therapist.

I am really struggling with this decision. I am terrified of how my splits will react. I am terrified to talk to my t about all of this. I am terrified of having to leave my comfort zone and go to a new therapist, if I choose to do so. I am just plain terrified.

I am thinking about talking to my friend Rae about it because she knows me very well too. I have a feeling she will also tell me to look for a new therapist but I still want to hear her opinion.

Man, this is just so complicated... I wish I knew what to do...



  1. It is complicated. I'm kind of puzzled by the first therapist response..."she has a lot of experience working with dissociation, and a little bit of experience with DID." Don't they go hand in hand?
    If your interested there is a wonderful book out there called "The Courage to Heal Workbook" by Laura Davis. It has a VERY helpful section on therapists and therapy,
    what to ask, what to expect...etc. If you want to hear more just email me at waitingtoexhale@live.ca

  2. A little over a year ago I found it necessary to look for a new therapist for the same reasons you have explained. It was a very tough time for me. I was very attached to my previous therapist, and yet I had to pull away. Then there was a long time where I had no therapist. That was tough. My best advice to you is to meet with a few therapists if you have the opportunity. I met with three before I decided on one. I saw each therapist 2-3 times before making my decision. Not all at the same time. The first one I saw three times because initially I rejected her and found myself very judgmental of her. I think this was not her fault. It was mine. I wasn't ready to trust another one. The second one I saw twice then I got a call from the third, so I talked it over with the second therapist (who I thought was pretty good) and decided I owed it to myself to check all my options. I am glad that I did because in the end I chose to stay with the third one. It was a difficult process because I found that many therapists, though they treated trauma, did not treat DID. I also had trouble finding someone that treated DID and took my insurance. It was a difficult time, but it has been worth it all. I have made a lot of progress with my current therapist---progress that couldn't have made had I stayed with my previous one. I wish you luck on your search.

  3. It sounds like, from what I've read over the past several weeks or so, that changing therapists is a good idea.

    Just follow your heart.