Foggy

Today has been hard for me. I don't know if it is this time of year or what, but I can't seem to stay out long enough to make sense of things. There is so much switching going on that there is no short term memory in place and it has been giving me trouble all day. I don't even feel like I'm making sense right now.

I have had the hardest time today remembering how to do the simplest tasks and what people tell me do to at work. Oh man is it bad! Today was just not a good day for me... I feel like I used to when I was younger - how time would just cease to exist. How I would be in one moment and then suddenly end up somewhere else with little to no clues. All day I have been piecing together the missing puzzle parts and once I finally start to make sense of something, I lose more time. I hope this is making sense.

I'm not sure if this is happening because of lack of sleep, or being so sick, or this certain time of year or a combination of all of these. It's frustrating... and it is bad enough that my mom expects me to be "normal" and that the majority of the people in my life don't even know I'm a multiple. I have been making up excuses all day on why I'm so "scattered" and "lost" and "in my own world". I don't even know if I have eaten today. I'm not hungry, so I assume someone has been eating for us.

Sorry if this post makes NO sense...I just needed to vent to someone who will listen and understand. Maybe this will all be better in the morning...

-Bee*