Tuesday, March 30, 2010

No Big Deal

So today went WAY better than I originally thought.

Interning was amazing! I got to test three different students and we had so much fun! I got in a lot of good observing time and I also taught a little portion of reading. It was actually the best interning experience so far this semester!

Turns out, my therapy/counseling sessions will NOT be changing to Tuesday nights. Apparently this was just a one time thing and we will be back to Tuesday mornings. Thank goodness for that!

And tonight's session went way better than I thought. Laura was out for the first hour and I assume that went well because she is more "chipper" than usual. I was out for the last 50 minutes while we continued watching the Oprah episode. A LOT of memories and emotions and etc came up and we were able to work through them and release them. I must say I feel like a small weight has been lifted - literally - so that is good. I am feeling really sick though, which is typical after working that hard with past events/memories. I'm hoping I will feel better tomorrow.

And just a question to those of you who also have splits/alters, do you ever find yourself questioning what "time" it really is? Like you're just going about your day and suddenly you feel like you've missed months. Let me explain... Today I was driving to the store to pick up a few things and I happened to glance to the right and out of the corner of my eye I saw a pumpkin. I immediately thought "Oh my gosh! It's October already?!?!" After I calmed down, I checked my phone and it said March 30, 2010. I checked it at least 5 more times after that just to be sure! But does that ever happen? Where you suddenly have this gut-wrenching feeling where you feel like you have missed months when really you haven't? I hate it...it happens to me quite a bit. I know I really do lose time - so I'm not saying that I don't - but sometimes I THINK I lose time, but I really haven't... Ever experience that?

Tomorrow is a new day and I'm looking forward to it! :)

-Bee*

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad the t session went well. I do know what it's like to feel that backlash, physically, after a really intense session. I'm usually so tired and my brain is fuzzy and it makes me irritable.
    As far as losing time... I have lost time, as much as five days, sometimes. I also have a strange sense of time where I will suddenly forget what time of year it is... like a sudden panic that I am behind on my Christmas shopping and then realizing it is March, so I can see how seeing a pumpkin could be confusing. I never really thought about the time thing as connected to DID; I guess I assumed everyone had that kind of confusion sometimes.

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  2. Ya, I usually get really ill after a really intense session and I become extremely irritable which drives my mother crazy! :P
    I also have those moments where I forget what time of year it is. It has been happening to me more the past 6 or 7 months. At first I assumed it happened to everyone but I started asking my friends and some family members and all of them looked at me like I was really weird (only one of them knows I have DID). So that got me wondering if it is connected to DID...?
    Thanks for you comment!
    -Bee

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